When you want to be taken seriously, it's best that you don't look daft. You have to be cool, calm, collected, but most of all, serious.
That's why we can only imagine that Amazon's decision to call episode 3 of 'Nothing: Tottenham Hotspur' (unofficial series name) 'NO MORE MR NICE GUY' (official episode name) was one of irony.
In fairness, up to this point, José Mourinho had presented himself as a much more open figure than people would have given him credit for, with his only real watershed moment being his rant where he repeatedly used the c word.
So how did episode three pan out? What could possibly make Mourinho turn from Bruce Banner into the Hulk? What nonsense has Dele been up to now? Step right up and find out - there's your spoiler alert.
After three wins from Mourinho's opening three games, spirits are high in the Spurs squad as they face their first big test under their new boss - a trip to Manchester United.
However, despite much media build up billing the game as Mourinho's chance at revenge, Tottenham are defeated, and what could have been a whole episode dedicated to a victory became a two-minute snippet. During a post-match debriefing, he criticises the attitude of his squad, and Harry Kane demands more of his teammates.
For the first time in the series, we then get an insight into the world of transfers, with a focus on the potential departure of Christian Eriksen. Chairman Daniel Levy admits to Mourinho that, after the player said he wanted to leave in the summer of 2019, he hasn't heard from his agent, and later admits they need to sit down with the Dane in order to understand the situation.
Back on the pitch, Spurs beat Burnley 5-0, featuring the Premier League Goal of the Season from Son Heung-min, and we are shown just how much of a superstar he is considered back in South Korea. Jan Vertonghen then scores a stoppage time winner away at Wolves, and he discusses how much he loves the club despite not agreeing a new deal while delivering supplies to a local food bank - his defensive partner Toby Alderweireld, on the other hand, signs a new contract. The episode is going at a leisurely pace.
But this looks set to be the last piece of good news for Spurs for a while. After weeks building up their London derby at home to Chelsea - a win would have moved Tottenham above them into the Champions League places - they lose 2-0, with Son being dismissed for violent conduct.
It looks like it's time for Mourinho to stop being a nice guy.
Key Talking Points
After the stinging defeat at Manchester United, Mourinho insists that the squad need to start showing their aggression more, alluding to his first tactical briefing about being 'c****'.
Daily Telegraph journalist Jason Burt suggests that this will help the new head coach discover who he can trust within the squad, and the episode largely leads down this path. Eriksen doesn't seem to be in consideration and Vertonghen still doesn't know where his future lies, but Mourinho's full of praise for Son and was reportedly a factor in Alderweireld signing his new deal.
Interestingly, to this point, there's been little to no mention in these episodes of Tanguy Ndombele or Giovani Lo Celso.
Believe me, having sat through both games at the time, Spurs' performances against Man Utd and Chelsea in this episode were rancid, worse than almost all that preceded them this season under Mauricio Pochettino. So you'd think this would lead to some great, great content in a behind-the-scenes documentary, right?
Well, not quite. The worst we see is Son's emotional reaction to being sent off and the dressing room looking a bit glum, but for the most part, Mourinho and his squad are spared - the most embarrassing thing we see are the scorelines.
Dele: Kyle, tell the camera what just happened.
Kyle Walker-Peters: No!
Dele: Why are you so angry?
Interviewer: Did you have an incident on the way in?
Walker-Peters: No, [Dele] crashed into my car - my parked car.
Mourinho: [Turned away from the whole squad and snarling] Be a bastard. Be a bastard...
Mourinho: First of all, if you did this before, it's because your coach stole from me. It's my copyright in the exercise.
Son: [After being sent off for clearly booting Antonio Rudiger square in the chest in front of millions of people] How is that red? How is that red?! Tell me, please!
This is really the first time that we as an audience accept that, no matter how bad Spurs' season gets (and trust me, it gets really bad), we're not going to be shown a full-blown meltdown that football fans are craving.
It's logical, of course, but that doesn't make it disappointing. As mentioned, if Spurs had beaten United or Chelsea, then those games and the scenes in the dressing room would dominate the episode, and could even have been standalone instalments. Instead, we get something continuing the narrative of Mourinho's arrival, assessing his squad and the options he has.
To a neutral, the stories following Son and Vertonghen aren't as interesting while the lack of content showing Spurs' defeats is annoying, and Tottenham fans have already lived through these moments already. What's left is a mismatch of storytelling that doesn't do much to appease either party.
However, with fortunes about to take a turn for the worse for Spurs, we live in hope that this is just the slow reveal of a collapse waiting to happen, and that with each blow comes more interesting viewing.
Source : 90min